Tina’s Nite Club
Like many cities, Cleveland has a collection of distinct neighborhoods, each with their own local feeling, culture, and night life. Downtown Cleveland will always be the epicenter (although it has seen some dwindling over the years), but neighborhoods like Ohio City, Tremont, or University Circle have thrived in their own ways. Then there are the neighborhoods that people do not talk about as much, like Kamm’s Corner or Detroit-Shoreway that, while mostly residential, still have staples that outsiders should try. One of the lesser spoken about neighborhoods, though appreciated by those around it, is Gordon Square. And on the outskirts of Gordon Square lies a location that is as unique of an experience as it is an unimpressive sight to see: Tina’s Nite Club.
If you never visited Tina’s before, the first time you go there may likely be with a group who has been there more than once. Perhaps Tina’s was the main event of a night out, or it was an afterthought when leaving one place or another. Either way, the first timer will approach the building and have one thought come to mind: This cannot be the place.
You are not on a busy city street with shops and snacks in all directions. Instead, you are at a neighborhood intersection; 3 corners out of 4 feature regular houses of residential streets. The 4th corner holds a fenced-in, square brick building. It does not belong, and yet there it stands. The fence is tall, with thick, black metal beams that curve out at the top. The building’s brick looks more industrial than it does inviting, and the only other architectural features are the front door and awning. There is a parking lot out back and ample street parking that, on a Saturday night, may all be taken. The only identifier is a small lit sign bearing the name of the establishment. So when you think to yourself this cannot be the place, don’t worry, you’re exactly where you should be.
If you have been to Tina’s before, that walk through the door feels like a homecoming, and everything is right where you left it. But if you are that first timer at Tina’s, walking in the door and looking around for a moment does not feel so sweet. You probably turned down other plans, or left a party, or could have simply stayed home. Instead, you are at an inglorious dive bar that has been overhyped, so you believe.
Immediately on your left you will see the long, wooden bar, with typical sports banners hanging behind it. There is no draft beer, and a limited bottle selection, though whatever you drink will be more than affordable. If you can find an open seat in the shoulder-to-shoulder space, you will look around and be unimpressed: The brick walls are thickly painted in white and undecorated. The tile floor is discolored, as it has not been replaced since its installation. The floor has high-top tables on one side, and a pool table on the other. But, the pool table is covered by tarp, and is surrounded by groups who could not find another spot in the house. Your first look at it all, you will likely be upset that you came, or at least disappointed. Don’t worry. Grab a drink, grab a seat, and grab onto your socks, because in about half an hour they are going to be knocked off.
The music at Tina’s should have gotten your attention the moment you stepped in the door. The only music that ever fills Tina’s are the songs sung by her guests. This leads us one step closer towards the magic of Tina’s. In most karaoke bars, the serenading drunkards are merely in the background, with maybe another room or two to avoid the amateur hour. At Tina’s, the karaoke is all there is. There is no side room, there are no TV screens (other than the ones displaying song lyrics), and there are no distractions from the show. And it is a show. The whole place is facing the singer. When you look around at the crowd, you can see that is the way the people want it.
The people are not only listening to the songs, but they are singing and dancing along like their favorite artist stole the show. The people are not only patronizing the performer, but they are vibing with them as if they are in on the act. What should be low quality karaoke (admittedly, it can be pretty low quality) somehow becomes a concert. Maybe the undecorated walls, out of commission pool table, and singular open room are all part of the secret formula. All roads lead to Tina’s, and all of Tina’s is facing the stage.
To be fair, when you go to Tina’s, you will see that it is not actually a stage. Instead, it is some open space of the old tile floor. But, it feels like a stage when you are up there.
No genre is off limits at Tina’s, neither by rule nor by audience appreciation. Your favorite karaoke hits are always hits. Classic rock will rouse the crowd. A country jam will make the honkies tonk. A love ballad, ideally performed with a partner, will prove that Tina’s is a place for love (more on that later). A bass bumping rap song, a pop punk anthem, the songs you grew up on, or the hit from your favorite childhood movie will make the whole place sing with you. Sure, you could say this about other karaoke bars too, but ask anyone who has been to Tina’s. They will tell you there is something different about it.
And that difference, that magic in Tina’s, is entirely owed to the people packing the place. Some of whom only came out for Tina’s, some of whom just left a club downtown, some of whom may still be dressed up from the wedding reception that ended hours ago, and some of whom are the regulars who would not be anywhere else. Billy Joel’s beloved song Piano Man, which you are likely to hear most nights at Tina’s, tells the story of the regulars of a bar Billy performed at in his younger days. With that in mind, entire albums could be written about the people of Tina’s. Although, it is best you go see them for yourselves, rather than reading this eye-witness account. Tina’s is meant to be experienced, to be lived.
Whoever they are, wherever they are from, the people all share a common spirit in Tina’s. The spirit of laughing at yourself singing, while sincerely celebrating someone else behind the microphone. The spirit of mocking the unimpressive architecture, while still choosing to stay among the crowd inside of it. The spirit of Tina’s – which causes the whole crowd to sing along to High School Musical, or form a conga line during The Monster Mash, or for groups of complete strangers to collide their groups for one night only – is a spirit unlike any other. All in a dive bar like many others before it.
By now, the first timer must have been inside long enough, and enjoyed at least a drink or two. Their foot may have started tapping, they may have found their group of friends, and they may have even put in a song request. By the way, to put in a song request, you walk up to the desk next to the stage where the host will give you a pen and a slip of paper. There is no app, no tablet, just the same karaoke system they have had for years. God willing, they will have that same machine for many years more. If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. And for a cash tip, you may get bumped to the front of the line.
If you plan to stay at Tina’s all night, and you have the right friends with you, it will not take long until you get it. Like a hoppy IPA or a bourbon with a bite, Tina’s is an acquired taste that your palate needs to adjust to. Once you have adjusted, and you join in on the magic, the spirit of Tina’s will get you. You will understand why you got enthusiastically invited here in the first place.
The best example I can give you of the magic inside of Tina’s was from June of 2021. After over a year of isolation, restrictions, and a limited lifestyle, the state of emergency from COVID-19 was lifted. No, the virus was not (nor has it been) eradicated, but to a population that was eager to return to normalcy, this was an occasion to be celebrated. We grabbed our vaccination cards, threw away our masks, and went to the first bar we could think of when we thought about the things we had missed: Tina’s Nite Club. And she did not disappoint.
Tina’s is a magical place on any night, but on this night, it was the ultimate party. We were free! We were back! Life was real again!
There was a different feeling in the air that night. Maybe it was all of the germs we were no longer used to. But what it really was, I think, was that until we were in this claustrophobically full bar of amateur tunes and cheap beverages, we forgot what it felt like to be out in a crowd. We forgot what it felt like to share real memories with strangers. We forgot what it felt like to be free. Sure, we probably would have felt that at any bar we chose to go to, but I am glad we felt it at Tina’s.
Another great night at Tina’s happened the following year, on St. Patrick’s Day. This story proves that Tina’s is a place for love, although every detail of this story should be saved for another day to give it the proper attention it deserves. But to be brief, I witnessed two friends of mine meet and begin their romance that night. If you would have seen them interact that night, you would not have guessed it was the first meeting. I did not see their first handshake, but I saw their first kiss. I did not hear their first I love you, but I heard their first duet. Sure, they could have met anywhere, especially since they met through a mutual friend of theirs. But I like to think that, were it not for Tina’s, they may not have had their love story. And that love story continues today. Tina’s is a place for love.
In my experience, I have had some bad times at Tina’s, but more often than not I have had some of my favorite nights at Tina’s. It is a place that myself and many others have made their way back to time and again. It is a place that myself and many others have dragged others to time and again. And after you think this cannot be the place, and after you get over feeling some type of way for that first half hour, you will get it too. So if you find yourself in Cleveland on a Saturday night, either with nothing to do or your eyes on the next bar to hop to, you should give this neighborhood bar a try. And when you get there, remember, I mean neighborhood literally.
Long live Tina’s, and may she never change.